King Hammurabi, and some of his rules

For the most part we as humans make and maintain laws in an attempt to create a life fair and honest amongst one another. This morning while researching Pete’s post “Truth or Trash?” I found these rules, from an ancient Mesopotamia king, I could not help but think of how his rules along, and our own modern law can be so absolute and leave little room for any of life’s ambiguities. I guess in our attempt to be fair we can some times really f' our selves just trying to do things right.

I couldn’t help but comment on what would happen if one was to impose Hammurabi’s rules on us here in the USA today.

• If one accuses another, but cannot prove it, the accuser will be killed. No thanks! I will keep my mouth shut! Just think about all those LA P.D. who accused OJ.

• If one accuses another, and can prove it, he shall be rewarded with money. Where will all of this money come from and how much? I smell a democrat.

• If a judge decides in a case, and later it turns out that he was wrong, he will have to pay twelve times as much as he set for the accused, and will never be allowed to judge anymore. Sounds good for Robots, but last I checked human beings are fallible.

• If one steals the son of another, he will be killed. I would like to add to this one, if he damages the merchandise then death will be extra slow and extra painful!

• If one finds a slave who has run away, and he brings the slave back to his owner, the owner will pay two shekels. It’s not worth my time or energy, you can go now.

• If a robber is caught while stealing, he will be killed. Sorry lady your baby just stole that stick of gum and for that he must DIE!!!

• If one does not take good enough care of a dam, and the dam breaks, he shall be sold for money, which will replace the corn ruined due to the over-flooding of the crops. Wow! Do you really think the current admin, and corps. of engineers will fetch enough on the slave market to pay for New Orleans?

• If one over-floods a neighbor’s crops, then he shall pay the loss. Your trial lawyer says good news! The term “loss” includes pain and suffering, your going to be rich!

• If one gives his garden to a gardener to take care of, and the gardener has done his job well for four years, on the fifth year the owner will have to take part in the gardening. Watch out America, you’re going to have to start doing those jobs you don’t want to do.

• If one is in debt, and cannot pay, he can sell himself, his wife, his son and his daughter to work; after three years they shall be set free. Only three? But GM finance told me it would be five!!!

• If one marries a woman, but has no relationship with her, it is not considered as a marriage. Yeah well I’m kind of sore about a lack of sex also, but I really like my wife, she has allot of good qualities. Only my dick could like this stupid rule.

• If a wife has a relationship with another man, both shall be tied and thrown into water, but the wife can be pardoned by her husband and given to the king as a slave. What if she slept with the king?

• If a man uses violence on another man’s wife to sleep with her, the man shall be killed, but the wife shall be blameless. Oh and who is going to do any accusing, remember rule 1.

• If a man is captured in war, and the wife leaves the house, even though there is enough food, she shall be thrown into water. What it if the house was about to be bombed?

• If a man adopts a son and he grows up in the adopter’s house, the original parents can not demand his return. I will admit that I like this rule.

• If anyone strikes a man whose rank is higher than his, the man shall be whipped sixty times with an ox-whip in public. Wahoo!!! I’ll have to track down my old classmates from grammar school… Looks like there is going to be some public whipping.

• If someone strikes another man equally ranked, he shall pay one gold mina. For each punch?

• If a man strikes a pregnant woman, and she therefore loses her child, he shall pay ten shekels for her. If you know me then you know I have a soft view on the death penalty, because I believe the any system is fallible. How ever if all truth could be know with out any doubt then throwing this guy in to an industrial meat grinder… alive, might be a good start!